The first kiss is one of life’s sweetest moments — but if you
don’t plan and execute it correctly, it can be an acutely embarrassing
experience.
Pulling off a great first kiss can be the difference between
scoring yourself a second date and being ghosted
the next time you send a tentative, “Hey, how’s it going?” text. So how
do you make sure you get it right? Here are the top 10 first kiss tips:1. Be Sure Your Date Wants To Kiss You
You can’t kiss someone who doesn’t want to kiss you back, so make
sure your date has demonstrated a clear interest in you. Use your
judgment here: If you’ve been getting along really well, you’re sitting
somewhere romantic, she’s touching her hair, giggling at all your jokes
and patting you fondly on the arm… well, kiss her. That’s your moment.
You could ask directly — “Would it be OK if I kissed you?” — but many
women report being turned off by this question, and would prefer you
exercised judgment and took control. Read the individual situation and
make sure you act respectfully, but forthrightly.
2. Make Sure Your Breath Is Fresh
Fresh breath
is a very basic requirement for any kiss, let alone the first with a
new person. You should be exercising good oral hygiene all year round,
and not only on the night of your date (that is, brushing your teeth
twice a day and flossing daily, just like your dentist told you to.) If
you know you have a date lined up and a first kiss might be on the
cards, skip the raw onions and cigarettes in the preceding hours. (Maybe
skip cigarettes in general? They’re bad for you.)
3. Set The Scene
You don’t want your first kiss to take place in a noisy, messy
setting, and you probably don’t want it to be somewhere too brightly lit
or conspicuous, either. Consider whether you will be locking lips in
front of an audience and ask yourself, “Is it appropriate to kiss here?”
A crowded bar or dance floor is fine, but if you’re in a low-key
environment or surrounded by small children, it might not be the best
place to suck on each other’s faces. Consider others around you and
their reasonable aversion to PDA, plus the comfort level of your date. A
low-lit, quiet and romantic setting is your best bet here.
4. Smell Good
We’ve already covered the topic of fresh breath, but to secure a
great first kiss it’s important to consider how the rest of you is
smelling, too. You’re going to be in close proximity to another person,
so sweatiness or B.O. will be seriously off-putting for your date. On
the flip side, smelling like a well-selected cologne or of fresh soap
will make your date swoon. Kissing is not just a tactile experience, it’s an olfactory one too; so make sure you have all her senses soaring (in a good way!)
5. Position Yourself Strategically
Unless you’re sitting close to your date and facing towards her,
you’re making the approach unnecessarily hard for yourself. You don’t
want to be leaning in from 3 feet away or surprising her with a kiss she
isn’t sure is coming, so give her a hint of your intentions by sidling
up close and touching her hand or lower back in anticipation — once
you’ve received clear signals to proceed, of course.
6. Approach Smoothly
A clumsy or over-forceful lean in could spoil the kiss before it has
even started, so try to make your approach as smooth as possible. In the
movie Hitch, Will Smith’s character advocates the 90/10 Rule:
you lean in 90% of the way when initiating the first kiss, and wait for
her to meet your lips by making up the remaining 10%. In real life, of
course, there are no hard and fast rules, but the 90/10 rule is a useful
guideline; encouraging you to take charge of the situation while still
allowing your date some input and agency.
7. Use Your Hands
Your hands are an important tool for elevating your first kiss from
mediocre to memorable. They shouldn’t be hanging limply while you are
kissing: You might cup her face, hold hands or graze her thigh or lower
back, depending on the level of intimacy you want to create. Err on the
side of tentative touching than full on groping, and give her space to
touch you back, too.
8. Go Easy On The Tongue
Too much tongue is an oft-reported kissing turnoff for women.
A great first kiss will involve mostly lip-to-lip contact, and, when
you do decide to reveal it, your tongue should be tentatively probing
hers rather than swishing around her mouth or repeatedly darting in and
out of it. Control your level of saliva, too — there are few things less
appealing than someone else’s drool in your mouth.
9. Time The Kiss Right
“How long should a kiss be?” is like asking, “how long is a piece of
string?”, but ideally a first kiss shouldn’t go on and on for eternity.
If both of you want to make out for a solid 10 minutes that’s up to you,
but generally a relatively short session will be comfortable and
appropriate, and build anticipation for a second kiss.
10. Consider Your Follow-Up
Success! You landed a first kiss. Now what? Don’t just sit there in
silence like a shell-shocked teen who can’t believe his luck. The
immediate aftermath of a first kiss is potentially awkward territory,
and the best thing you can do to diffuse the moment is say something.
“I’ve been wanting to do that for ages” is a slightly cliche but
flattering line, or you could use the post-kiss lull to land a genuine
compliment. Whatever you do, keep the mood alive and avoid crashing into
an anticlimax. That’s all you need to do to make sure your first kiss
is a great one.
From: Askmen
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