My sister's words kept ringing in my head...
"u think I pluck money from trees abi you think it's easy doing ushering
job".... I have always thought ushering job was one easy way to make money,
but the thought of doing 'yes ma' yes 'sir' to some rude people and standing
for hours made me detest it.
But as am
completely broke atm, I do not av a choice than to jump at it. Omo kia I said yes to my sister when her offered to introduce me to it. 1st of all, i had 2 fight d battle of height
and beauty to be called for the job, then I finally got called for a meeting
with d client, on getting there, the 1st thing she noticed was my hair, she
said it was too short and razz looking(eyes rolling) so I had to
borrow money from a friend to make nice long hair. Finally Saturday
morning, am ready for d job. On getting 2 d venue that morning, I met
other girls gisting about previous jobs as it was my 1st time, I just kept a
low profile. Finally they brought the dresses. OMG u won't believe the size, colour
and length of the ridiculous gown, considering my stature, I knew I was going
to look funny in the dress(sad face) but still I had my mind on the pay. After
dressing up,it was time to make up, as always my brows were on fleek and I did
a good job on the face(big grin).In my funny looking agbada gown, some guys
still made offensive passes @ me *eyesrolling* and I had to be as polite as
possible while telling them 2 fuck off. After standing for about 6 hours, I
found place to seat,i prolly just sat for say 2mins before madam
saw me and started shouting' I won't pay u 5 kobo' *scared of not being
paid* I then begin to do all I can to ensure madam sees am are doing my
job. All of a sudden I just discovered half of the girls were not in the
hall, kia, I went outside to see what was up, Naso I see girls chawing at the
back of the hall o, Talo fe ku(who wan die)*lmao*even my sister slied me when
it got to food matter. emi omo eko mi o ya dull(lagos babe like me), I took
plate, got food and joined them.*ROTFL* after eating, aburo iyawo (wife's
sister)who could not be older than my immediate younger brother gave us
souvenirs to share, on a normal day that babe can not see me outside and call
me jumoke, aunty lo ma pe mi(she'll call me sister jumoke), but still I kept my
mind on the pay, I smiled and collected the bags then started distributing.
Yoruba women will never disappoint "aunty usher iya kabira o ti gba bagi
o, o wa party o, o lo toh ni o"(usher kabirat's mother has not collected
o, she came for the party but she went to the toilet). I couldn't help but
laugh at their funny comments. After d job, it was time 2 get paid*smiling* den
madam started calling name and even threatened not to pay if u do not hear your
name d 1st time she calls it. like I dinnor work for it*eyesrolling* finally am
done for the day, it's prolly past 8 pm nd am walking to d bus stop jeje,
den 1 baba old enuf 2 be my father stops his car nd tells me He is
lodging in so so hotel if I don't mind, egbami o, shey I resemble olosho
ni( do I look like a hooker) @ least av bin paid so I insulted the man to my
satisfaction and moved on with my waka. On getting to ojota, awon omo ibo
were waiting for me with shoes and bags *my love for shoes tho* night
market on point, i branched with the intention of prolly getting 1 flat shoe
for 1k5 but instead I ended up buying 3 now am left with 500h, my exact T fare
to my bus stop. Owo bike sef no show, not to mention the money I borrowed to
make my hair.......looking forward to getting another job on time at least I
must sha pay olaitan back the money I borrowed to make my hair that is if I
don't buy bags or mac's ruby woo with the money...olorun a sanu mi (may God
have mercy on me) hmmmmmm Am outta
here.......secret life of an event hostess by adejumoke
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